I asked Matthew from Adventure-Some.com to provide this guest post, because I know that boredom weakens relationships, while adding excitement is shown in research to strenghten bonds. So, here is the advice of an adventurer:
You don’t have to be married for long before you and your spouse settle into a routine. While this can be comforting and easy to do, it can also mean that the excitement from your dating days quickly begins to wane. Fortunately, it doesn’t take a lot of effort to get more adventure into your marriage. Here are 10 simple things that you can try.
1. Go exploring.
A common part of that routine is settling into using the same routes every time you go somewhere. Have you ever wondered where that road on the left goes? Why not find out? Get in the car and explore the areas you don’t always visit. (If the weather’s nice you could explore on foot and become better acquainted with a smaller area.)
2. Try a new restaurant.
My wife and I love going out to eat. While we love visiting our favorite restaurants, it can be easy for us to just go to the same ones over and over. One thing that has helped us is to keep a pad of paper in the car and every time we find a restaurant we’ve never been to, it gets added to the list. Then the next time we don’t know where to go eat we can pull the list out and have some ready suggestions.
3. Try a new food.
Maybe you’ve tried all of the restaurants in your area. Fortunately, that doesn’t mean have exhausted all your options! Go to a favorite restaurant and try something new. Maybe they have a seasonal menu, or you just happen to always order one of two things. One suggestion that I’ve found to work out well for me: try the weirdest-sounding thing on the menu, it’s probably what the chef has put the most work into creating.
4. Turn off the TV.
Do you find yourself lamenting the lack of time that you have to spend time together? Shut off the TV and solve that problem. Instead of getting sucked into watching someone else have an adventure, get out and have your own! (Maybe it’s not the TV for you, but the computer, or your cell phone. Whatever the gadget, don’t forget to spend time unplugged!)
5. Do a common activity in a new place.
Hopefully you and your spouse already have an activity that you do together. Even fun things can become routine, however. Switch it up by trying a new location. You can read, chat, or even play a game together in a lot of different places. Check out a park, coffee shop, book store, or any where else that might work for you.
6. Do something together that you normally do apart.
Help each other do something that you normally do on your own. Perhaps one of you normally does all of the cooking. Tonight the other one could assist (maybe just by keeping the cook company).
7. Do something apart that you normally do together.
Don’t forget to do the opposite sometimes, too. If you always do something together, it can be a nice change of pace to have that time to yourself. Maybe you always get ready together; take turns, and enjoy the extra space in the bathroom this once. Or take the time to slowly make and enjoy your coffee or tea, just the way you like it.
8. Get out of the house.
If you’re quietly going stir-crazy, then it’s time to get out, together. Go for a walk in the park (or in the mall if it’s not your favorite weather.) This is the perfect time to become a tourist in your own town. Stop by the local visitor’s center and see what kind of attractions you over look just because you live in the area.
9. Stay in the house.
Perhaps your problem is just the opposite, you’re never home! Cancel some appointments (I promise they can live without you at least this once) and stay home together. Dust off those board games or pull out the deck of cards and start family game night! If you need new games, then a trip to the toy section is in order (don’t be ashamed to visit the toy store, you can be kids too.) What kind of a prize is the winner going to receive?
10. Plan a grand adventure.
Want a bigger adventure in your life? Sit down together and plan out your next one! Brainstorm ideas, choose which one to do first, figure out a time frame, and start making it happen. After all, dreams are best when they’re shared, and they’re easiest when you’re working on them together.
Which of these are you going to try today?
Matthew is a minimalist who creates, rides motorcycles, and loves his wife. Find more ways to add adventure to your life at Adventure-Some.com.
Photo by graur razvan ionut courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net.