Be Optimistic about Relationships

Sometimes the bad news about marriage can seem overwhelming. Dr. Russ Guss writes about optimism in relationships in his Moment-to-Moment Optimism blog. He finds there is plenty of good news, for example some facts he shares:

*The 10-year marriage failure rate of college and non-college graduates is down to 16% for first time marriages in the 1990s.

*Men and women born in the 1930s and married in the 1950s have the highest marriage without divorce rate of any generation: 96%.

*The majority of couples who experience infidelity in marriage remain married.

*Individuals who marry after age 25 have better odds of making their marriage succeed.

*Weaker relationships appear to be ending before marriage. (Selecting a life mate is a huge decision. I’m hoping people are giving it a little more serious consideration.)

*Couples are choosing to overcome tough problems and make their marriage work through “hard work.”

*Society cares little whether the man or woman makes more money.

*In the early stages of a romantic relationship, our brains “turn off the button” that searches for perceived personality flaws and focuses on fun and pleasure. (This may be helpful when it comes to falling in love, but keep in mind that your brain is naturally inclined to be more negative with your long-time spouse than with the new cutie in the next cubicle. Your perceptions can override reality. Instead of looking elsewhere, if you continually put positive energy in your marriage, you will improve your chances for success.)

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