Keep Choosing Right for Your Marriage

The truth is you already know most of what your marriage needs. You probably come here for inspiration or reminders, but deep down you know what keeps your family thriving. The hard part is making the effort, making the time and keeping your priorities straight.

So, today is a day for some simple reminders that aren’t so simple to keep in practice. I’m going to include two links—the first is from a divorced man named Dan Pearce who learned the hard way what he should have been doing all along to save his two failed marriages. It’s humorous and entertaining, yet husbands and wives alike are praising his advice as the ticket to more bliss and fewer divorces.

His feedback on what he would do with a do-over is here at 16 Ways I Blew My Marriage. Sometimes a good laugh will help us remember the message. From the serious, “Tell her what she is doing right,” to the not-so-serious, “I’d wait to fart until I was in the bathroom whenever possible,” Dan covers a lot of ground.

For other useful reminders, check out: 10 habits to keep marriages strong from Redbook Magazine with advice from David Wilk, a couples therapist in Vancouver. I think his #10 tip spoke to me loudest—remember it’s the little, everyday behaviors that mean the most.

“When it comes to relationship satisfaction, you can’t just ride on the big things like, ‘I don’t drink, I pay the bills, I don’t beat you, we went to Hawaii last year,’” says Wilk. “This stuff is not really what keeps couples happy in their daily lives.” What really matters is all the small stuff that adds up, such as being there for each other when one needs to vent, or noticing when he needs a hug, or making him his favorite meal just because. “It’s also giving up on the idea that you have to feel in love all the time. Marriage is about trust and commitment and knowing each other,” says Wilk. “That’s what love is.”

From my own perspective, I know that family dinners and family walks help us connect, and that carving 15 minutes a day to talk to my husband is important. I also regularly have to remind myself to say out loud the things he is doing well, to express gratitude and praise. It’s all too easy to become too ships passing in the night, especially when he is traveling or working the night shift, and sometimes we have to work harder to be affectionate partners not just parents, workers and homeowners. Some days, all it takes is a longer-than-usual hug and kiss to get us back on the same page. Other days, actually scheduling a date night out is needed.

Take the reminders that help you most, and put them to use today and tomorrow, next week and next year. When you’re on the right path, surprisingly good things can happen. If you get off the right path, do what it takes to get back.

Which of these reminders speaks most to you? What do you do to keep your marriage moving on the right track on a daily basis?

Lori Lowe is the author of First Kiss to Lasting Bliss: Hope & Inspiration for Your Marriage. It tells the inspiring, true stories of couples who used adversity to improve their marriages–from overcoming drug addiction to cancer, infidelity, religious differences, family interference and infertility, among many others. It’s available at Amazon.com and in all e-book formats at www.LoriDLowe.com.

Photo credit: Lori Lowe

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One response to “Keep Choosing Right for Your Marriage

  1. Pastor yousaf Haroon

    Today the message of God,Important Relation of women last part, people think women are weak fool,feet of shoes and woman not equal with man,but i do not agree with them.women born all the paradise,spiritual people the holy people,healers,preachers sisters,righteouse people,pastors.people say women are weak,fool,feet of shoes,not equal with men.women born the kings,prince,presidents,prime ministries,leaders.women born judges,lawyers,teachers,doctors,scientists.people think women are weak and fool.women born army officers,soldiers,heroes.women born Abraham,Isaac,Joseph,Moses,Aaron,David,Solomon,Job, John,Jesus.they say women are weak,fool,senseless,feet of shoes.women born grandfather,father,son,brother.it is written in the holy bible women were prophetess .Exodus 15:20 2 kings 22:14 2 Chronicles 34:22and Luke 2:36 today women are preachers and singers and pastors.Galatians 3:28 says there is neither Jew,neither greek there is neither slave neither free .there is neither male neither female,for you are all one in Jesus Christ.every mother always loves her son.it is a nature of mother.Mary loved Jesus too much.Mary had been living with Jesus.on the third day there was a wedding in cana of Galilee.and mother of Jesus was there,now both Jesus and his disciples were invited to the wedding.John 2:1 when Jesus was twelve years old,while his parents were returning home,the boy Jesus stayed behind in Jernusalem.after three days they found Jesus in the temple.mother of Jesus said,’to him son why have you treated us like this,your father and I have been anxiously searching for you.Luke 2:41:48 near the cross of Jesus stood his mother his mother a sister Mary the wife of Clopas,Mary magdalene.John 19:25 Mary mother of Jesus loved much more Jesus.she was with Jesus at last time.Moses Aaron sister name also the Miriam.other people think aaron sister the Miriam is mother of Jesus,but it is wrong thing.Moses and Aaron sister Miriam about four thousand years before Mary Jesus of mother.without woman no beauty in the house.without woman no beauty in the world.this time half population women in the world.women are educated,intelligent,knowledge,understanding.women have wisdom knowledge ,understanding .we should give honor mary mother of Jesus and other all women not worship Mary just respect her because she is mother of Jesus.there is neither male neither female,for you are on in Jesus Christ!Amen! God bless you through this message of God.

    your brother in Christ. pasto yousaf

    ________________________________

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